With all due respect to The Kinsey Sicks, who, if you don’t know, is a fantabulous dragapella group who perform their own, often politically scathing songs and recorded I Wanna Be A Republican…..
Not in a gajillion years did I consider that this thought would ever cross my mind. But friends and strangers I have just laid eyes upon Jenna Bush’s wedding photos and I felt the veil of confusion lift and the sorrow and heartache ebb. Yes, brothers and sisters, there exists a tasteful bride and she was/is the heir apparent to the Republican throne. I know nothing of this woman except that, bless her heart, she’s made the most of her looks. But I implore you to cast your eyes upon the bride and deny the existence of a fashion higher power. He/She has been known to take on the mortal form of Oscar de la Renta at times. But it is more than the dress that is neither a get-up suitable for a party at the Hefner mansion or for a stroll down a modern day red carpet. Yes the dress is beautiful and tasteful and flattering and sophisticated and festive and brilliant. But yeah as I cast my eyes upon her it is more. On this fair spawn of conservative royalty there is nary a dangling plastic earring, a spray tan or updo. There are some flowers tucked into her hair (no doubt by a team of no less than six hair stylists) and an almost scrubbed glow to her face. There is no (g-d help me) “bling” on her whatsoever. She is lovely and a beacon of hope in a world gone mad with bridal vulgarity.
So I conclude, and don’t think it doesn’t pain me to say it, perhaps conservatives are not the devil.
Now I ask you to consider the following:
How or why is it that during a time when more and more of our country embraces conservative positions, more and more people seem to be embracing what can only be called liberal mannerisms. The ideas are conservative but the dress and promiscuity are anything but. What is the law of physics that is being employed?